Personality of the year
José Mourinho: keeping press conferences interesting since 2004. His 2017 highlights:
• Bemoaning United’s injuries in April: “At the moment, we cannot walk from the bed to the toilet.” • Mocking Antonio Conte for bemoaning injuries in October: “I never speak about injuries. Other managers, they cry, they cry, they cry when a player is injured. I don’t cry. If I wanted to cry like the others, I can cry. But I don’t.” • Pledging in July not to be brought down to Conte’s level: “Listen, I’m not going to lose my hair to speak about Antonio Conte.” • Walking out of a press conference after 11 seconds in May. • And explaining why he wouldn’t discuss snubbing a Mark Hughes handshake in September: “I don’t speak about stupid things. Stupid things are for stupid people.”
Quote of the year
Fifa’s Gianni Infantino: adopting a proven model for his presidency in May – terminating the ethics team investigating him and attacking “fake news and alternative facts”: “Fifa bashing has become a sport in some countries. But we’re transparent. We’re a deeply honest organisation.”
• 2017’s best Fifa moments:
a) Ex-Peru FA head Manuel Burga, on trial for racketeering in New York, censured for making cut-throat gestures at a key witness. His attorney told the court Burga was a “gentle, meek, timid man” who had simply been “scratching a skin complaint”. Burga was acquitted this week.
b) Infantino reacting to the IOC banning Russia 2018 head Vitaly Mutko for life over the country’s “unprecedented attack on the integrity of sport” by declaring the ruling had “no impact” on Mutko’s fitness to deliver a credible World Cup.
And c) Philip Chiyangwa – Zimbabwe FA head, Fifa power-broker and millionaire YouTuber – launching his own fashion label in August with an open video message to God: “This morning, God, I only ask for abundancy … The power to make money, more of it … Money, more money, God, make it come my way. Thank you very much. Good morning to you everybody. Good morning to you God.”
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Worst attempted PR save
Lewis Hamilton: looking to regain some goodwill in November, 10 days after the Paradise Papers showed him avoiding tax on his £16.5m private jet and holding a Maltese company for his image rights. @LewisHamilton: “Guys, to support kids living in poverty I’ve donated a pair of my PUMA shoes to @SmallStepsDocs and signed them.”
Lewis Hamilton
(@LewisHamilton)Guys, to support kids living in poverty I’ve donated a pair of my PUMA shoes to @SmallStepsDocs and signed them.
Support their great cause by making a bid here on the link below:
👉🏾https://t.co/lJdKC5Km3E pic.twitter.com/JIpUkbz54Q
Best comeback
Serena Williams, posting online after Maria Sharapova’s 2017 memoir referenced her “thick arms and thick legs”. “I’ve been called a man because I appear outwardly strong. It has been said that that I use drugs. (No, I have always had far too much integrity to behave dishonestly in order to gain an advantage.) It’s been said I don’t belong in women’s sports – that I belong in men’s – because I look stronger than many other women do. (No, I just work hard and I was born with this badass body and proud of it.) We don’t all look the same. We are curvy, strong, muscular, tall, small, just to name a few, and all the same: we are women and proud.”
Referee of the year
Romain Poite: putting melodrama first in July, rescinding the late penalty he awarded the All Blacks against the Lions, resulting in a drawn series. Stuff.co.nz called it a “French farce” and a “massive late clanger”; the New Zealand Herald wrote: “Not even in the under-11s does a referee change his mind like that… Here we are [again] talking about idiots in white.” Warren Gatland called the decision “swings and roundabouts”.
Most misunderstood
Double drug-ban veteran Justin Gatlin – upset in August after fans booed his 100m win over Usain Bolt in the London Stadium. “People in the crowd should get to know an athlete, read the details rather than the headlines – know who you’re booing.” Four months later, new headlines emerged: allegations that his coach Dennis Mitchell offered to supply an undercover reporter with performance enhancing drugs. Gatlin said he was “shocked and surprised … I am not using and have not used PEDs. I fired him as soon as I found out.”
Throwback of the year
Ilie Nastase – banned for three years in April after Britain’s defeat to Romania in the Fed Cup in Constanta, having repeatedly asked for Anne Keothavong’s room number, reduced Johanna Konta to tears, abused a journalist, and said about Serena Williams’s then-unborn baby: “Let’s see what colour it has. Chocolate with milk?” Nastase said his remarks were “intended as a joke” and had been “misinterpreted” via “biased and exaggerated media coverage”.
Proudest mismanagement
Also struggling with unfair media coverage in 2017: FA head Martin Glenn – sorry for “the inappropriate banter” aimed at Eni Aluko by coach Mark Sampson, but happy with the FA’s 17-month effort to sort it out. “I believe we handled this with decency and openness,” he said in October. “The spirit in which we approached Eni’s concerns has been good.”
Most predictable Ashes moment
England’s Ben Duckett taking a relaxed view about advice not to cause scenes in bars. Trevor Bayliss: “It’s boys being boys I guess, but I’m disappointed. With what we’ve had to go through already, it’s not acceptable.”
Best rethink
Speed-skater Elise Christie – who nearly retired after being penalised at all three events at Sochi 2014 while receiving death threats from South Koreans (“skating almost ruined me, ruined my life”), becoming a triple world champion in March. Not enough for Spoty’s voters, though.
Best annual tradition
A John Inverdale #everydaysexism storm. This year’s effort: March’s observation about the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge watching Wales v France in the Six Nations: “I don’t know exactly how au fait with the rules Kate is, but I assume she must have been struggling a bit in the last 20 minutes.” BBC statement: “John was saying that many would have been bemused by the protracted end of the match.”
Image of the year
Jacksonville Jaguars players reacting to @realdonaldtrump’s call for them to be “fired or suspended” if they repeated their racial injustice protest. Jaguars and Baltimore Ravens players took a knee at Wembley in September; Ravens owner Steve Bisciotti: “We respect their demonstration and support them 100%.”
Most extended metaphor
Anthony Joshua, explaining November’s “get fit, you fat f***” tweet sent to Tyson Fury: “Sometimes if a dog barks at you so many times, the other dog needs to bite back and make sure the other dog puts his tail between his legs. I always address a situation before putting it into the back of my mind. I’m not one of these dogs that stays in the garden barking for hours.”
Saddest exits
Among 2017’s most affecting football moves:
• January: Hull sacking Mike Phelan in the same week they sacked youth coach Peter Ndlovu. @eddo75: “You’ve lost Ndlovu and Phelan, whooah Ndlovu and Phelan.”
• March: Petersfield manager John Robson going home at half-time of their 4-2 loss to Kidlington in March. Chairman Graeme Moir: “He told the players in the dressing room: ‘that’s it’, and then drove off … It’s been a frustrating time for everyone.”
• April: Gillingham’s kitman Bob Lewin “leaving the club” after forgetting to take the players’ shirts to their away match at MK Dons. Manager Ady Pennock: “I would like to thank Bob for everything he’s done in his time here.”
• October: Bert Ehm, 70, coach of German fifth-tier Teutonia 05, sacked after ending a tense press conference with the phrase “Sieg Heil”: “It was a giant error on my part … I’m no National Socialist. Those words just kind of tumbled out of me.”
And 2017’s strongest votes of confidence:
• 7 Feb, @lcfc: “CLUB STATEMENT. #lcfc would like to make absolutely clear its unwavering support for Claudio Ranieri.” 23 Feb, @lcfc: “Club statement: #lcfc and Claudio Ranieri part company.”
• 23 Oct: Sunderland chief executive Martin Bain tells fans to calm down about Simon Grayson: “I look at my calendar and I see it’s only October. We’re in October, there’s a long way to go.” 31 Oct: Sacks him.
• 20 Oct: Brazil’s Santos president Modesto Roma Júnior attacks “made up” reports about his plan to sack coach Levir Culpi, and draws an analogy. “These are reports about a situation that simply doesn’t exist. We’re united at this club. You could say that here in this bacon omelette of ours, everyone is pork, and nobody is chicken. In a bacon omelette, the chicken may be in there somewhere, but the pork is essential. At Santos, everyone is essential. People should know I only ever do what is best for the club. Not what is best for me, or what I can do to please public opinion. I only do what’s best for the club.” 29 Oct: Sacks him.
Proudest record
Carlo Tavecchio – reflecting on his image in November after a “media witch hunt” forced him out as Italy’s FA president. Tavecchio said press were unfairly focusing on his financial crime convictions, his six‑month racism ban and his censuring for homophobia, antisemitism and sexism at the expense of his “record of success … All [the press] ever wanted was Tavecchio on the cross.”
Best intentions
Lower league Italian side Quiliano, staging a “zero tolerance to racism” demonstration in March by blacking-up and posing for selfies. League officials called the move, intended to support a team-mate targeted by racist fans, “a real gesture of honour”.
Most festive
Bristol City manager Lee Johnson explaining December’s ballboy-based goal celebration after their winner against Manchester United: “When the ball went in I didn’t know what to do, no one knew what to do. I wanted to go on the pitch but I couldn’t, so I just ran down the line. It was great to see the ballboy there. He got an absolute rib‑crushing from me.”
Worst new trend
Essex police, @EPControlRoom, 20 November: “Ringing 999 because West Ham have lost again and you aren’t sure what to do is not acceptable. It is a complete waste of our time.” See also @cheshirepolice, 17 December: “Calling 101 to complain that the person you voted for in Sports Personality of the Year didn’t win is not an appropriate use of the service.”
Best era-defining moment
Theresa May – sitting next to Emmanuel Macron in the posh seats at June’s France versus England match in Paris – joining in with the Mexican wave seconds after everyone else had sat down.
James Dart
(@James_Dart)The lady’s not for timing pic.twitter.com/X77P054fqN
Most uplifting
Adam Peaty, matching Sonny Bill Williams’s 2015 moment – giving away his European Swimming Championships gold to a wide-eyed nipper in December. “Thankfully for me I’ve got a few of them already. But for her that’s hopefully going to change her world, and inspire her for years.”
Most enjoyed legal ruling
November’s judgment against Blackpool owner Karl Oyston – found to have “illegitimately stripped” the club of £26.77m, 10 months after he called fans protesting about asset-stripping “a busted flush … I’m sure they’ll get bored in time. They’re naive, child-like … I pity them.”
Most principled legal stand
Australian tennis player Thanasi Kokkinakis, fighting Kellogg’s through the courts for the rights to use his nickname, Special K. Kellogg’s: “Special K is obviously an iconic brand and a favourite breakfast cereal of Australia.” The case continues.
Most versatile
Ronaldinho – signing up to play in November’s Match for Peace in Mexico to promote “dignity, coexistence and tolerance”, a month after he signed up to play alongside Chechen warlord Ramzan Kadyrov in a match to mark Vladimir Putin’s birthday. Kadyrov told local media: “Ronaldinho was very grateful to be invited. He spoke enthusiastically about the benevolent atmosphere in Grozny.”
Best tactic
Jordan Spieth – realising he could use the flashbacks from his 2016 Masters meltdown to end his July 2017 Open meltdown. Spieth, who started his final round with three bogeys in four holes then took a drop 70 yards back on the 13th, said later: “I was thinking: ‘Are we really going through this again?’ And I got over it. It took a crazy drop to get me going.”
Social media awards
• Best political satire: @andy_murray, 24 Nov: “BBC just called to say I was PROBABLY going to be named sports personality of the year but I would have to agree to an interview and a major photo shoot. I said probably is no good and took a pass. Thanks anyway!”
• Most versatile live tweeting: @baldocktownfc, 21 August: “Sorry for the lack of updates during the last 10 mins yesterday. Our Twitter correspondent had to go on as sub.” @nedkelly56: “How did he rate his performance?” @baldocktownfc: “He was very good. Should have started.”
• Most surprising turn of events: Harry Redknapp – who told a court in 2012 how “I write like a two-year-old and I can’t spell … I can’t work a computer, I don’t know what an email is, I’ve never sent a text, ask anyone, I couldn’t even fill a team sheet in” – tweeting on 12 October: “Proper excited about Mobile Cryptocurrency! I’m in, get involved!”
• And most exasperated: Twitter’s @TheRealMikeDean – US hip-hop producer and Kanye West collaborator – facing down his haters in January: “i’m not a reff”; “wrong mike dean”; “soccer is wack”; and “I AM NOT A SOCCER REFF U LIMEY F***. DO YOUR RESEARCH.”
Most exacting
Sergio García fan Alex Windebank, writing to his hero in October. “I saw you win the Masters and when you won it I saw that you were happy. I want you to win 24 Majors, 90 PGA Tours at the end of your career. Majors: 10 British Opens, 3 Masters, 5 PGA Championships, 6 US Opens. Practice everyday at different golf courses. I’ll be watching you on TV.”
Sergio Garcia
(@TheSergioGarcia)This is one of the cutest, nicest and funniest letters I’ve ever received! Love the way kids see everything! Nothing better than being a kid! Thank you Alex Windebank 😉 pic.twitter.com/rPrsS73E7t
Best knowing your audience
Aston Villa owner @Dr_TonyXia: a) Talking to Villa fans on Twitter in March: “#We are a team. #Fight through …. I didn’t buy Villa 4 business purpose. I never expected making money from it.” b) Talking to Bloomberg in Beijing about how he nearly bought Southampton instead. “We will now leverage this opportunity and use it to further our business in the sports industry.”
Saddest ending
Ebbsfleet defender Yado Mambo – famous in November after Lou Bega fans launched a campaign to get his No18 shirt replaced with the No5 – forced to retire due to injury, aged 26. “Heartbroken doesn’t even come close to how I feel. I’m gutted my journey couldn’t continue. But one door closes, another opens.”
Most reliable entertainment
The EFL and its Carabao Cup draws. First round: “The EFL would like to apologise for third-party technical issues. The draw was not compromised in any way.” Second round: “The draw was in no way compromised.” Fifth round: “The EFL would like to apologise for third party technical issues. The draw was in no way compromised.” Their most upbeat draw: the 4.15am third round event in China, which took 53 minutes to complete: “This was the culmination of a really positive and successful few days for the EFL in Asia.”
Pat of the year
Ospreys hooker Scott Baldwin: needing four operations and missing three games after trying to pat a lion during a pre-match visit to a Bloemfontein game park in September. “Sometimes you do things you regret. It’s something I can learn from.” Saracens fans sang “In the Jungle” at him on his comeback.
Best solo performer
Botswana athlete Isaac Makwala, doing press-ups on the London Stadium track after running his 200m world championships heat solo in August. Makwala, banned from his 400m final by the IAAF over a norovirus outbreak at his hotel, said: “I put everything on God after what happened. This crowd is so amazing.”
Best ‘Agüerrroooo’ moment
Georgia’s top-flight football title race: decided by a 96th-minute penalty in November. Dinamo Tbilisi captain Otar Kiteishvili stepped up to take it, knowing that a goal would win the title for his side, and a miss would mean opponents Torpedo Kutaisi would be crowned champions. He missed.
Excuse of the year
Eoin Morgan, blaming the pitch after England’s Champions Trophy semi-final defeat to Pakistan by eight wickets in June. “Knowing we were going to play on a used wicket potentially brought Pakistan’s game closer to their home conditions. It was too much of an ask for us to adjust.” @MichaelVaughan’s analysis: “Well, that’s what you call a good dicking.”
Best PR strategy
LaVar Ball, father of a UCLA basketball player detained for shoplifting in Shanghai, getting @realDonaldTrump worked up in November by failing to give him credit for securing his son’s release. Early morning Trump tweets called him an “ungrateful fool … it wasn’t father LaVar’s so-called people in China that got his son out – IT WAS ME.” Ball kept it going by goading Trump on TV – with the resulting publicity worth an estimated $13.2m in ad value to his fashion label.
Worst PR strategy
In a big category: the ATP’s draw ceremony for the Next Gen ATP Finals in Milan in November – male players being asked to pick from a group of female models who all had the letters A or B hidden on their bodies. Each model then revealed their letter; one player was asked to pull off a model’s glove with his teeth. The ATP said it was meant to be a nod to Milan’s fashion heritage, but “our execution was in poor taste. There will be no repeat in the future.”
Best newcomer
Serie A Palermo’s new president Paul Baccaglini – TV personality, nude model and founder of a 2009 joke political party based on lemons (slogan “Yes, We Lemon”) – reassuring fans over his credibility in March while stripping off to reveal his club chest tattoo. Predecessor Maurizio Zamparini called him “a serious president, a very intelligent person”. The takeover collapsed four months later.
Training routine of the year
This from Tony Adams – filmed demonstrating his defensive moves at Granada in April. He left a month later, after seven straight defeats and relegation.
Best unveiling
Diego Maradona – meeting the press in February, 24 hours after being named as a Fifa goodwill ambassador. His key message: denying he hit a reporter who asked him a question: “I obviously didn’t hit you. If I hit you, you wouldn’t have a nose. One on one, I’d destroy you.”
Suit of the year
Indonesian businessman Erick Thohir – asked in August why he bought Inter Milan in 2013 – mistakenly reminiscing about Frank Rijkaard, Ruud Gullit and Marco van Basten, who joined AC Milan in the 1980s: “I’ve been an Inter fan ever since they bought the Dutch trio. Buying a club isn’t just a matter of business – you have to love that team.”
Biggest attention seekers
Headlining 12 months of viral animal cameos:
• Argentina’s San Lorenzo v Arsenal de Sarandí held up in September after a sausage dog invaded the pitch then chewed a microphone in post-match interviews. Groundsman Julio Duarte adopted it to join 10 others he uses to keep pigeons off his grass seed. “I’m keeping her. We need what she’s got.”
TyC Sports
(@TyCSports)San Lorenzo encontró el camino al gol gracias al aporte clave de él. Como a todo protagonista, le acercamos el micrófono de @PasoAPaso 🐶😂 pic.twitter.com/czWrjknUxe
• Baltimore Ravens’ TV game against Miami Dolphins held up by a cat in October. An M&T Bank Stadium worker told local media later he’d taken it home to replace his recently deceased 17-year-old tabby Mrs Prissypants. “I just call it fate. She’s so loving. She’s going to be a perfect fit.”
• Kerridge Cricket Club’s game against Mossley in July delayed when players and umpires were charged by a loose bull. Kerridge captain Adam Banks: “The video’s even been shared in India and Australia. It’s great because it’s put us on the world map.”
• Jaguares de Chiapas v Pachuca in Mexico held up twice in January – once to remove a dog that chased the players, then to remove a cat that “sat down and stared them out”. Chiapas coach Sergio Bueno alleged “premeditated acts”, saying: “They timed the release of the dog and cat to destroy our rhythm.” Pachuca denied it: “We were as surprised as they were.”
• This TV viewer:
(@GerrardsPrime)Think I’ve found my favourite ever GIF pic.twitter.com/CVDDwthfBw
• And this squirrel – striking a pose while being carried off by a Manchester City groundsman in October. Press dubbed it “Squirrel Regis”.
Most persecuted
Argentina’s U20 coach Gerardo Salorio, 57 – suspended in February for trying to climb perimeter fencing to fight fans. “People call me old, a drunk, but I just climbed the fence to look for the haters. I’ve said a thousand sorries, but I’m feeling like Jesus to be honest – everyone at me for no reason.”
Oversight of the year
Thailand’s Satri Angthong keeper Akkaradet Jangporn, 17 – not worried about going viral in October after he ran off his line to celebrate a shootout victory as the ball spun back into his net. “I forgot to look at the ball. But it’s just a life lesson. All the insults are my motivation. I just have to prove I’ll get better.”
Most in love
Belgium: Mechelen defender Uros Vitas, feeling “resilient” in February after his torso tattoo of his wife’s face went viral. “It is easy to mock, but Snezane is everything in the world to me. It turned out how it turned out. There are no regrets.”
(@sporza)KVM-speler Uros Vitas laat gezicht van zijn vrouw op zijn lichaam tatoeëren https://t.co/Yu1uVv0YUQ pic.twitter.com/NjY1zyVWZw
Most instantly famous
South Africa’s Free State Stars striker Mohammed Anas, explaining what he meant in a post-game interview in March when he thanked “my fans, my wife and my girlfriend … I mean my wife.” Anas: “I don’t have a girlfriend. I call my daughter my girlfriend. That’s what I was talking about.”
Most speechless
Portugal’s Sporting B coach João de Deus: reacting to his side conceding while celebrating a goal at the other end which was disallowed by a “mad late flag … It seems we have entered an age of surrealism. I cannot find the words. It’s so terrible. For me, this ends it all.”
Best clarification
Australian sauce firm MasterFoods, reacting after their BBQ Sauce bottle mascot made “one-finger gestures” at Newcastle Jets fans who taunted him in October. “The behaviour of the BBQ Sauce bottle is not reflective of the family friendly MasterFoods way.”
Plus: best attitude
Romanian Liga IV Venus Bucharest’s keeper Emil Constantinescu, reflecting on their 26-1 defeat to Academia Rapid in November. “If they didn’t score the first 10 goals, I think we could have won it. But we take some positives. We get our heads up, and we go again.”