‘The Meg’ is a mediocre ‘Jaws’ update nobody asked for. Expect a sequel.

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“Fast and Furious” fame can’t keep Jason Statham out of the water. Statham, a living action figure, truly became a star in the U.S. after joining the long-running car chase franchise. And his leading role in this weekend’s new blockbuster “The Meg,” is a testament to his Hollywood bonafides. But Statham first cut his teeth on bad 1970s knockoff action films, leaning into the role of a gravelly voiced, working-class version of Charles Bronson. “The Meg” is essentially a 21st-century version of “Jaws,” with all the bells and whistles of modern-day movie magic. But there’s still something undeniably retro about it — at the end of the day, no one really matters except Statham, the shark and his poison-tipped harpoon gun.

The plot is simple. Man messes with nature in search of profit, nature messes back by eating man. Unlike the Florida locale of the original “Jaws,” this films is set off the coast of China. (Not coincidentally, China is also becoming the target demographic for a film like this, as are most of these mediocre disaster movies that have been cropping up recently. See also: Dwayne “Mr. The Rock” Johnson’s unnecessary “Die Hard” reboot “Skyscraper,” which came out last month.) The shark is bigger, too — Jaws is tiny next to the prehistoric Megalodon that Statham and co. are up against. (The boats are also bigger, but predictably they’re still not big enough.)

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Everyone winds up in the water before it’s all said and done, but the movie isn’t horror. Far too many characters survive for it to be labeled that. Even the dog lives. That doesn’t make it a bad movie, merely one aiming for “family friendly.” The results are fairly forgettable.

But while the body count may be weak, the special effects are impressive. Massive amounts of CGI went into this film, and it shows. Viewers who have ever indulged in the Discovery Channel or “Blue Planet” will likely enjoy the beginning of the film, which imagines what life was like in a part of the ocean completely cut off from the rest of the world for millions of years. The title shark is also quite impressive, as are all the medium-sized sharks people keep accidentally killing instead of it. The film even adds in a few extra disaster clichés, along with the thousands of panicked beachgoers, because why not.


This flashy underwater scene-setting can only do so much, though. It’s clear that studio executives believe Statham is now on the same level as action superstars like The Rock and Vin Diesel. In other words, they expect him to be able to carry the weight (or lack thereof) of the film entirely on his brawny British shoulders. He’s the guy with the gun and everyone else is there to recite mostly clichéd lines during unnecessary faux-emotional plot points. It’s a compliment, although in some ways it feels outside his comfort zone.

Nearly all of Statham’s early films were either actual remakes of bad disaster/action movies from the 1970s (“The Italian Job,” “Death Race,” “The Mechanic”) or they were films that fit into that genre. A great example is 2013’s “Parker,” which co-starred Jennifer Lopez. It’s all about bank robbers and double-crossing and murder, but the movie only comes to life when Statham is in the middle of the action sequences.