Brian May says he 'falls to pieces' as Queen legend makes devastating admission

Importance Score: 45 / 100 🔵

Queen Guitarist Brian May Discusses Mental Health and Coping Mechanisms

Renowned Queen guitarist Brian May has openly discussed his mental well-being, acknowledging that his state of mind “darkens” if he is not actively engaged. The 77-year-old father of three has previously spoken about his experiences with depression and admitted that he still finds it challenging to prevent relapse. “I have undergone considerable therapy. Currently, I am not in therapy. I maintain a busy schedule; staying occupied serves as my therapy. I recognize that this might not be the most conventional form of therapy,” he conceded.

The ‘Human Doing’ Dilemma and Personal Struggles

“Indeed, a central tenet from my past therapy sessions was the question: ‘Are you a human being or a human doing?’ It highlights that to simply exist as a human being, one should be able to be at peace with oneself even without constant activity. I confess I lack that capacity. I require constant engagement, or I am prone to feeling overwhelmed. I begin to overthink, and my outlook becomes exceedingly bleak. I become self-critical and the like,” he explained.

“When I am busy, and I achieve small victories—creating a pleasing piece of music, conducting a positive interview—I feel a sense of accomplishment, thinking, ‘My day was worthwhile’,” he shared on the Fret Not podcast in 2023.

Past Battles with Severe Depression

May has been candid about his past battles with depression, particularly recalling a period of severe depression in the early 1990s.

Triggering Events: Loss and Trauma

A sequence of traumatic events and losses, starting with the passing of his father at age 66 in 1991, closely followed by the demise of his bandmate Freddie Mercury at age 45 on November 24 of the same year, precipitated this decline, leading him to a point where he “nearly drove off Hammersmith Bridge.”

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“It feels as though you are paralyzed. I recall losing the ability to perceive color. The world literally appeared colorless. Even music failed to resonate with me during the most acute moments. Depression would envelop me like a black fog,” he recounted.

Coping with Loss and Finding Strength

“I possess considerable inner strength and a positive outlook, yet because I did not adequately process the grief, I carried an underlying depression for an extended period. Subsequently, when I reached a complete crisis point, I had also lost my mother,” he revealed to the Mirror in 2002.

Catalogue of Loss and Despair

He further elaborated on this phase of his life in a 2021 discussion with The Independent. “I was predominantly deeply depressed and dejected, enduring too many losses concurrently. Losing Freddie, the perceived dissolution of the band, the breakdown of my marriage, the potential loss of contact with my children, and the loss of my father—it was a significant sequence of losses.”

“The situation with my children was particularly distressing, the feeling that I was losing them. Divorces often become contentious and acrimonious, and frequently, I was fighting for visitation rights. It felt like a predicament I was ill-equipped to handle and did not want to be in…”

“Something truly collapsed within my mind… I had never sought professional assistance. I simply succumbed to it and attempted to resolve it independently. It culminated in numerous occasions where I nearly drove off Hammersmith Bridge. I was unable to cope,” he stated.

Moving Forward and Finding Peace

Since that period, May has developed strategies to manage his grief and later married his second wife, Anita Dobson.


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