You could sum up the pop culture of the past decade with the phrase “everything old is new again.” Not only that, but everything new is actually old. The new and the old coexist on screens big and small, and this is something that we’re all kinda used to. Veteran actors keep returning to their old roles, old versions of characters keep popping up in new movies, dead franchises are resurrected as TV shows — none of it feels surprising. It’s fun, sure, if you like that sorta thing (I, for the record, like that sorta thing and I just can’t help it).
The only one of these returns that felt even the tiniest bit surprising? Michael Keaton’s impending return as Batman. And now, thanks to the big brains in charge of Warner Bros. Discovery, Keaton’s old man Bruce has been shelved along with the rest of HBO Max’s nearly complete Batgirl feature film. Then there’s the other movie featuring the return of Keaton’s Batman — this one scheduled to actually be released in theaters. That film is 2023’s The Flash, a film whose future is more up-in-the-air than Hawkman thanks to the erratic and violent behavior of star Ezra Miller. And because of comedy’s rule of threes, we gotta mention the rumor that Keaton filmed a post-credits scene for Aquaman 2… that has (this is a rumor) since been reshot (this is a rumor) using Ben Affleck (this is a rumor) just in case The Flash enters the Speed Force or something. I don’t know how the Speed Force works, even though it was part of the most memorable movie moment of all time or whatever.
This is an absolutely heartbreaking turn of events, a catastrophic development to a return that already seemed too good to be true. All of the other big returns — Harrison Ford to Indiana Jones, Patrick Stewart as Picard or Professor X — always seemed plausible. Like, of course Ralph Macchio’s gonna star in Cobra Kai. Of course Jamie Lee Curtis is gonna come back to stab Michael Myers some more. Did Sylvester Stallone ever really stop being Rocky or Rambo? And that’s the one thing that all of these rather disparate returns have in common: it never felt like any of these actors cut off communication with any of these roles. The door always felt ajar, if not fully open.
It felt different with Michael Keaton, though. That may be because Keaton famously stepped away from the role 30 years ago and resisted any temptation to come back. A lot of his contemporaries from the hits of 1989 and 1992 have come back for more, like the surviving Ghostbusters in Ghostbusters: Afterlife, Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter in Bill & Ted Face the Music, the casts of Karate Kid and The Mighty Ducks. The Father of the Bride cast even did a Zoom reunion. The longer Michael Keaton held out, the less likely it seemed like he’d even put on the cowl and cape again. Hell, he played two bird-themed super-characters (Birdman, Spider-Man: Homecoming) and it still felt like Batman was a long shot.
That’s why his return felt huge! And, on top of that, the 30 years of work Keaton’s done since flirt/fighting with Catwoman in Batman Returns has only made him an even more captivating and unpredictable performer. What in the world would a Michael Keaton Batman look like today after his turns in Spotlight and Dopesick? The comics and cartoons have given us a grizzled old Batman before, famously so, but we’ve never seen him in live-action. 70-year-old Michael Keaton is the Batman from Frank Miller’s Dark Knight Returns. And it is a damn shame that we won’t get to see this performance in Batgirl, and we may not get to see it at all.
So, what’s the deal, Warner Bros. Discovery? Why are you denying us the return of — let’s face it — the one true Batman? Okay, okay, okay, I was born in 1984. Obviously my allegiance is to Keaton. Keaton’s Batman was the hero of my childhood. He is Bruce Wayne to me and to an entire generation (or two) of fans who would gladly subscribe to HBO Max and pay a premium price in order to see him come back for more. Why are you afraid of success, Warner Bros. Discovery? Are you afraid of taking a risk on what seems like a sure thing? Be brave. Be dangerous. Come on! In the words of Keaton’s Bruce: “Let’s get nuts.”