In some ways, we truly are in this together. 

We’re binge-watching the same shows, discussing the same all-important social issues that 2020 has managed to push to the forefront and sharing the same damn Tiger King– and Love Is Blind-inspired memes because, yeah, if 2020 were a couple it absolutely would be the ill-fated Jessica Batten and her 10 years younger suitor Mark Cuevas

But for all of our commiserating over how tough it is to homeschool and the generally agreed upon notion that jeans are utterly worthless, a simple fact remains: not all quarantines are created equal. 

We, for instance, have been riding out our own shelter-in-place situations in abodes outfitted with neither a bowling alley nor a home theater. The closest we’ve come to a glam room is that time we laid all of our makeup out on the bathroom counter and, unless you count the 15-step distance from couch to refrigerator, even the most charitable description of our living quarters wouldn’t reference separate wings.

So, sorry, denizens of Hollywood—sometimes you’re simply nothing like the rest of us. 



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