Noelle Harrison has been reunited with her long-lost family (Image: JOHN NEED)
AS WE got off the plane at Perth, Australia, my heart was hammering and my throat was dry with nerves. My husband, son and I had travelled there to visit my sister Jane, brother Paul and their families.
Nothing so unusual about our family get-together across continents except for the fact that, less than a year before, my Australian family didn’t even know I existed and this was going to be the first time I met most of them.
I had always known I had a sister as well as two other brothers but the reality of us ever being together always felt like a far-off dream.
My big sister existed in my childhood make-believe world, always by my side in fantasy games of castles and fairytale dramas.
Every summer when we visited my mum’s Irish family I would sit on The Wishing Chair in Lough Key Forest Park in County Roscommon and wish I could find my big sister.
It seemed my wish would never be granted. I remember asking my mum about my half-siblings but she could not tell me where they were. We later discovered we had all lived within an hour of each other, although none of us knew.
Indeed teenage Jane had worked in the garage where my mum bought her petrol. It is quite likely I would have seen her while waiting for mum as I gazed out the car window. My brother Fintan and I were the secret family.
My parents had fallen in love while working for a design agency in London in the 1960s but my father was married to Jane and Paul’s mother at the time. Mum later told me she never wanted to break up their marriage.
When she got pregnant with my brother Fintan she decided to go it alone and had my brother as a single mum. Eighteen months later I was born, even more of an accident than my brother.
To protect us from bullying at school mum pretended to be divorced rather than reveal she was unmarried. However on the advice of my convent school headmistress Sister Mary Anthony she told us the truth when I was 12.
I remember thinking: “What’s the big deal?” I was proud of her for not needing a man to look after her.
My mum was very resourceful, working as a cook and housekeeper in big houses in the idyllic home counties and providing my brother and I with a happy and secure childhood. I didn’t miss not having a father because I didn’t know any different.
Later dad would go on to remarry and there was another younger brother.
As the years went by I really did assume my siblings knew about Fintan and I but clearly didn’t want anything to do with us so I decided to let it go and stay focused on the family I did have around me.
UNITED: Noelle and Jane share the same interests and are now cherishing every moment as half-sisters (Image: NC)
However that all changed when I started researching the design world for my novel The Gravity Of Love. Online, my brother Fintan discovered the self-published autobiography of our father, a designer himself.
In the acknowledgments were the full names of his three legitimate children. Jane told me later he originally didn’t include her and Paul’s names but she had insisted.
“Do you think we should try to find our sister and brothers?” Fintan asked me. “Of course!” I declared without hesitation. My curiosity outweighed any fears of rejection.
Within five minutes I had found Jane on Facebook and as soon as I saw the photograph of her smiling face I felt confident she would respond positively to my email.
I wrote immediately but to my disappointment I heard nothing back. Weeks went by and I resigned myself to the fact my sister didn’t want to know me.
Then out of the blue came an email. Jane had only just seen my message and was overjoyed I had found her. There was more: although she lived in Australia she was travelling in Europe and could meet me in London in a few weeks.
We met for the first time in a café in South Kensington, both of us shaking with nerves, but as soon as we saw each other the connection was immediate.
Noelle alongside her mother during a birthday (Image: JOHN NEED)
We talked for more than four hours. We were both daughters of an absent father although we made sure not to dwell on any negative aspects of the past.
I have heard stories of lost siblings found and how very different they can turn out to be but the most incredible revelation was the discovery that all of my siblings feel as if cast from the same stone.
In particular, this is so with Jane. We have the same taste in books, clothes, art and theatre.
Indeed Jane was the first reader of my new novel that draws inspiration from the story of my parents and reflects the power of love that pulled my lost family together again.
Jane’s presence in my life has filled the gap left by the loss of my mum when she passed away in 2005. On our trip to Australia we were greeted with open arms and with such warmth by my new family.
Since our first trip to Australia Jane and I have seen each other as often as we can: in Norway, Italy, Scotland, Ireland, Istanbul and London.
Each time we meet the bond deepens and the sense of all the missing pieces of my family story have finally come together. It is the simple times of sharing which bring the most joy.
Last week Jane was in Edinburgh with me and we prepared dinner together one evening. Two sisters, chopping vegetables, while sipping our wine and having a good natter. My childhood wish come true!
FATHER: Had a secret family (Image: JOHN NEED)
The long-lost sister from Australia: Jane’s story
DESPITE the shock revelation, from the moment Noelle first contacted me I wanted to meet her and Fintan. Her message had been lost in cyberspace for six weeks and I was horrified she might think I didn’t want to know her.
I remember calling her up as soon as I could and amid tears and laughter we had our first conversation as sisters. Since that day six years ago our bond as sisters has grown stronger and stronger.
Finding Noelle and Fintan and their families has been very important and extremely positive. I had always seen my life as incomplete. Like three sides of a square, the fourth one missing.
Much of that is connected to when dad left mum, Paul and me to get married again. But finding Noelle and Fintan has added a fourth side and it feels like my square is nearly complete now.
Being with Noelle is different from being with a girlfriend. There is an unconditional quality to our relationship. With Noelle I feel I don’t have to impress her and I can share ideas and thoughts on anything with ease.
GROWING UP: Noelle with her brother Fintan (Image: JOHN NEED)
We contact each other at least once a week, usually messaging, and talk on the phone every couple of weeks. Despite the big distance between us we remain close and I have made a big effort to travel as frequently as I can so that we can meet up.
When we do meet hours can pass talking but there is never a sense of making up for lost time. I think both of us agree there is no point thinking of the past.
All we can do is move forward since we can’t get back what we never had. We are united in our choice to make the most of what we have now.
● To order The Gravity Of Love by Noelle Harrison (£8.99, Black and White Publishing) call The Express Bookshop with your card details on 01872 562 310 or send a cheque payable to The Express Bookshop with your details to Gravity Of Love Offer, PO Box 200, Falmouth, TR11 4WJ or online at expressbookshop.co.uk. UK delivery free.