Drew Barrymore Reflects on Self-Love and Embracing 50
In a candid personal essay, actress and talk show personality
Finding Joy in Solitude
Barrymore begins by describing a feeling of readiness and a sense of entering a new phase of life with enthusiasm. Reaching fifty, she expresses a newfound appreciation for her current life stage, a sentiment she wouldn’t have predicted in her younger years.
“Now, listen: If you had told me in my 20s, or even my 30s, that I would be so wildly happy just being in my own company, I would have laughed. Because I was always chasing something: love, adventure, the next exciting thing. I wanted to fill my life with people and movement and big feelings. And don’t get me wrong — I still love a grand adventure. I will never not be incredibly passionate about road trips and overpacking snacks and singing along to music with the windows down. But somewhere along the way, I realized the company I was forever going to keep … was my own.”
The Shift in Perspective: From Waiting Room to Chosen Path
The turning point, according to Barrymore, arrived when she altered her perception of being alone. She ceased viewing solitude as a temporary state between relationships or accomplishments. Instead, she embraced it as a deliberate and enjoyable choice. This realization of contentment in her own presence brought her immense liberation.
“I think, for me, the real shift came when I stopped looking at being alone as a waiting room. Like, I wasn’t alone because I was between relationships or because I hadn’t figured something out yet. I was alone because I genuinely enjoyed it. I was choosing it. I didn’t need to fill every moment with noise. And when I tell you that was the most freeing realization of my life? Oh. My. Gosh.”
Embracing Personal Time and Self-Care Rituals
Barrymore started prioritizing self-care and personal enjoyment in unprecedented ways. She initiated solo outings, prepared elaborate meals for herself, and curated a comfortable home environment. She found pleasure in quiet evenings at home, enjoying activities like watching classic television shows, rather than feeling obligated to attend social events. This embrace of her authentic self led to a stronger sense of self-identity.
“I started doing things for me in a way I never had before. I took myself out on little solo dates. I cooked for myself like I was hosting some fabulous dinner party — candles, music, the whole thing. I made my home exactly how I wanted it. I embraced the fact that I love a night in my pajamas, watching reruns of The Golden Girls, instead of being out at some fancy event. And what’s funny is, the more I embraced me, the more I felt like the truest version of myself.”
50: A Blend of Confidence and Playfulness
Reflecting on the significance of turning 50, Barrymore describes it as a unique stage characterized by a fusion of self-assurance, accumulated wisdom, and a continued sense of lightheartedness. She notes the beauty in accepting life’s uncertainties.
“Now, I have to say, 50 is a really interesting age. Because it’s this beautiful blend of confidence, wisdom and still feeling like a total goofball who doesn’t have it all figured out (and maybe never will — and that’s OK!).”
Looking Forward with Enthusiasm
Barrymore conveys a sense of grounded excitement for the future. She emphasizes that she is not slowing down, but rather gaining momentum. She maintains her ambitions, her passion for love, work, and creative pursuits, and her enjoyment of simple pleasures.
“I feel settled in a way I never did before, but I also feel excited. I’m not winding down — I’m winding up. I still want to dream big. I still want to throw myself into love and work and creativity. I still want to do ridiculous things like go to bed at 9 p.m. and wake up at 5 a.m. just to drink my morning iced tea in peace. I want all of it.”
Cherishing the Longest Relationship: Yourself
Barrymore underscores the paramount importance of self-care and self-love, asserting that the relationship with oneself is the most enduring one. She advocates for being one’s own support system, source of joy, and companion. While welcoming external love, she firmly believes that personal fulfillment should not be contingent on others.
“And I think the biggest thing I’ve learned? You are the longest relationship you’ll ever have. So, if you don’t take care of yourself, if you don’t cherish yourself, then what are we even doing here? I want to be my own best friend. I want to be the person I can rely on, laugh with and celebrate with. And if love, in any form, comes along and adds to that? Beautiful. But I refuse to believe that life starts or stops because of anyone else.”
Embracing the Present Moment
In conclusion, Barrymore expresses contentment as she enters her fifties and extends an encouraging message to readers experiencing their own life transitions at any age. She emphasizes the importance of self-acceptance and self-love in the present moment, independent of future achievements or relationships. Barrymore concludes with anticipation for the future.
“So here I am. Fifty. Feeling really good about it. And if you’re in the middle of your own shift — whether it’s at 30, 40, 60 — I just want to say: You’re allowed to love yourself right now. Not when you get that job. Not when you lose the weight. Not when you fall in love. Right now. You are already enough.
And I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait to see what’s next.”