A New York City woman scheduled her suicide note stating she was ‘no longer in pain’ to post on Instagram the day after she jumped to her death from the Vessel sculpture in Hudson Yards.
Yocheved Gourarie, 24, of Brooklyn, died December 22 after she fell from the 150-foot walkable sculpture at about noon, police told the Village Sun.
The next day, on December 23, her apparent suicide note was shared in a posthumous post on her Instagram account.
Yocheved Gourarie, 24, scheduled this photo and a farewell message to go live on Instagram the day after she jumped to her death from New York City’s Vessel sculpture in Hudson Yard
Gourarie’s Instagram post warned her followers to sit down before they read the caption
Gourarie ended her posthumous Instagram post by noting that she is ‘no longer in pain’
Gourarie noted that she had planned for her final post – a photo of herself with her face turned up toward the sun accompanied by a lengthy caption – to go live on social media in the wake of her death.
At the top of the post, which was shared with her 891 followers, Gourarie added a warning in all capital letters, noting that the information in the post was ‘sensitive and shocking’ and suggested people ‘sit down before reading’ it.
Gourarie then wrote: ‘Hey. This is pretty surreal isn’t it? One might say uncomfortable. Jarring. Just close the app now if you want. I guess if you don’t know by now you should probably sit down.
‘If you’re reading this, I’m gone. Either that or somehow incapacitated in the hospital so I can’t delete this scheduled post. I really hope I’m not though.’
Gourarie wrote that she didn’t ‘care to go into the reasons why I’m gone, but there are certainly more than thirteen,’ referencing the popular young adult novel and Netflix TV series, 13 Reasons Why, about high school students in the wake of a classmate’s suicide.
Gourarie’s previous social media posts noted that she had been struggling with anorexia and depression and that she had recently returned from inpatient therapy treatment
Gourarie is the second person to have jumped to their death from the Vessel (picture), a 16-story tall walkable sculpture in New York City’s Hudson Yard
Earlier posts on Gourarie’s Instagram account made reference to the fact that she struggled with anorexia and depression, while also advocating for mental health.
In May 2019, she wrote that she had finally started seeking help for her depression and was ‘Wondering whether I can change. Wondering whether I want to change. But there is one thing I do know: I am experiencing small joys again.’
Several of her TikTok videos posted in recent months appeared to take a humorous approach to therapy sessions and also referenced overcoming suicidal thoughts. Her latest videos showcased her singing and solicited tips for improvement.
In her final Instagram post, Gourarie wrote that she had scheduled a ‘note to send to my parents posthumously’ which included more details about her apparent decision to take her own life.
She acknowledged that posting a public suicide note on Instagram might cause her parents pain.
‘I don’t want to do that, I just want to leave my last mark on this world,’ Gourarie wrote.
‘All of you have made my life so much more full, brighter, and happier than it would have been without you. Your support, your encouragement, your hugs, your invitations, your smiles, your texts, your tagging me in memes you think I’d find funny.’
She went on to say that ‘None of you could have done anything – or done more – to prevent this from happening. You all did your absolute best and for that I am eternally grateful. I hope you can find some comfort in knowing I am no longer in pain.’
She ended the post by writing ‘I love you.’
According to her TikTok videos, Gourarie had traveled to Utah for inpatient treatment for her eating disorder in August and returned to New York City in late October, after having had her discharge date postponed by two weeks.
Gourarie was a bright student, who was valedictorian of her graduating class at Shalhevet High School. She then graduated with a 4.0 GPA from Macauly Honors College at CUNY, according to the Village Sun.
She had spent the past two and a half years interning at New York City’s National Yiddish Theatre Folksbiene.
Gourarie is now the second person to have apparently committed suicide by falling from the Vessel since it was opened in March 2019.
In February, Connecticut college student Peter DeSalvo, 19, jumped from the top of the 16-story sculpture.
Call the toll-free 24-hour hotline of the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255); TTY: 1-800-799-4TTY (4889)