From 2010 to 2014 Richard Cobbett wrote Crapshoot, a column about bringing random obscure games back into the light. Except this week, because the game decided to play silly buggers. Instead, here’s something from everyone’s favourite director, Uwe Boll.

BloodRayne 3 is a movie that clearly didn’t need to be made. Same goes for BloodRayne 2. The first film though, I can at least see the attraction of the license. Nobody could ever make a good BloodRayne movie, and no matter how much love and money was poured into the project, it would never lead to, say, Dame Judi Dench walking down the red carpet, Oscar in hand, gushing over the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to play the Queen of the Lecher Bitches. You could however make a fun BloodRayne movie—a knowing, confident, trashy action flick that slammed its first reel down on the table and said “Look, it’s a hot redhead vampire chick in leather, killing Nazis. You in? Bring popcorn.”



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