REDS MISSED?
While assorted Liverpool players and their nearest and dearest have been raising brand awareness by posting #content of themselves either at, or on their way to various warm-weather holiday destinations around the world on FaceSpace, Instachat and TokBook, the current whereabouts of their manager remains unknown. Having announced immediately after his side’s FA Cup fourth-round draw at Shrewsbury that “it will be the kids who play” in the replay, Klopp assured reporters he would not dignify it with his presence either. He was subsequently accused of disrespecting both Shrewsbury and the grand old competition.
On the first charge he’s bang to rights. On the second, not so much. After all, the FA can hardly complain about the Cup’s integrity being eroded when the fifth-round draw was conducted on a Monday night episode of a light entertainment programme that also featured an interview with Donna Air, some shameless BBC cross promotion for a TV drama about a family of sisters working as divorce lawyers, and the eagerly awaited announcement of the results of the Royal Society for the Protection of Birds’ Big Garden Birdwatch. As the great Mel Brooks once famously said of The One Show – while appearing on it – “This is nuts!”
Although neither Liverpool’s regular starters nor manager will be showing up at Anfield, the team’s supporters will be out in force. Earlier on Tuesday, the club announced that all their cut-price tickets have been sold and urged anyone who doesn’t have one to follow the lead of their senior players and not travel to Anfield. Once the 54,000 who do turn up manage to tell the players selected by stand-in manager Neil Critchley from the mascots accompanying them out on to the pitch, an intriguing game between the whey-faced cream of Premier League academy talent and some older, wiser and more gnarled League One bruisers should unfold.
While Shrews manager Sam Ricketts claims to understand Klopp’s reasons for sending out the kids, he has been grumbling about the loss of earnings his club will ship on the back of slashed ticket prices and an absence of TV revenue. “‘Let’s say we walk out with £150,000 off the back of this replay,” he said. “But if it was a full-on game you’re looking at half a million and another £72,000 from television.” His complaint is understandable but slightly disingenuous, as there is no guarantee that Anfield would have been anywhere near full if ticket prices had not been reduced, no guarantee this game would have been televised even if Klopp was fielding a senior side, and no guarantee Shrews would have got a replay if Klopp had fielded a better team first time around. It also seems to have escaped Ricketts’ notice that by playing Liverpool’s Kindergarten XI, Shrewsbury’s chances of advancing to the last 16 – and trousering the accompanying £180,000 in prize money – are hugely increased. With a lucrative trip to Stamford Bridge up for grabs, Sam’s Shrews will make a nice few bob however things unfold.
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QUOTE OF THE DAY
“I can’t see that our accumulation of points over the past seven months of the Premier League is luck. I think that’s an insult to the players. I really, really do. They might not be the best technically but they go out and give as much as they can. That’s all you can ask” – Bernard Cribbins has a go at critics of his Newcastle team.
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FIVER LETTERS
“My team may be facing yet another relegation battle, the manager may have only just realised that 70% possession means nothing if you always lose 1-0, or that his best forward is the old bloke that he’s left on the bench for most of the season. But let’s look on the bright side” – Tony Crawford.
“Re: pre-match music (Fiver letters passim). My team, Dover Athletic, ran out for several seasons to the mellifluous pipes of Tina Turner belting out Simply the Best. This being when we were, er, in the Isthmian Premier and – later – Vauxhall Conference (South)” – Shaun Thompson.
“All this talk brings to mind the halcyon days at Ninian Park when Cardiff City employed Ali Yassine as DJ and stadium announcer. One of many shining examples of his mirth-provoking choices followed our 2-1 victory over Coventry City, in which the away side had a potential equaliser disallowed at 1-0, causing the Sky Blues’ manager to fly into a foaming-mouthed rage which was exacerbated by the award of a penalty from which our late second goal came. His side’s very late consolation, if anything, served only to stoke his ire further. That manager (not as popular in south-east Wales as he briefly became a few years later)? Chris Coleman. And the song which accompanied his arm-waving remonstrations with the officials as they left the pitch? The Ray Charles classic Hit the Road, Jack” – Barrie Francis.
“I’ve been impressed with Cardiff’s attempt to gee up the crowd for the second half by blaring out The Game by Motorhead, which anyone who has watched WWF/E in the last 20 years will know as Triple H’s entrance theme. It’s just a shame that their football is of such a low Pedigree” – Steven Kirkwood.
Send your letters to [email protected]. And you can always tweet The Fiver via @guardian_sport. Today’s winner of our prizeless letter o’the day is … Barrie Francis.
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BITS AND BOBS
Barcelona’s Ousmane Dembélé could be done for the season and then some after suffering thigh-rip.
Claudio Ranieri has apologised after a section of supporters made insulting chants about Napoli during Sampdoria’s 4-2 Serie A defeat. “I’m so sorry, especially since I’m very close to Naples,” he said. “I apologise to all the Neapolitan fans, obviously our fans were angry with the referee and took it out on those who had nothing to do with it.”
Torino have given manager Walter Mazzarri a hefty boot after a run of four defeats, replacing him with Moreno Longo.
Bradford City are on it like a car bonnet, appointing Stuart McCall as manager for the third time after ditching Gary Bowyer.
West Ham will install two new tiers of seats closer to their London Stadium pitch in time for the 2020-21 Championship season.
And two South Korean fans have been awarded $312 in compensation after Cristiano Ronaldo failed to play in Juve’s pre-season trip to Seoul last year.
STILL WANT MORE?
Golden Goal is back, baby, with Rob Smyth exulting in Clive Allen’s extraordinary solo goal for QPR at West Ham in 1984.
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