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It’s been a while since I quit drinking (a choice I made mostly because alcohol plus a panic disorder and clinical depression either don’t mix at all, or mix all too well), but I still feel awkward sometimes at bars, and experience the occasional craving after a crummy day. Generally, I feel more secure and happier without alcohol – largely because I recall that my times with alcohol weren’t always merry, and I feel my health has improved without it.
But what if you want to take a break from or eliminate alcohol not because you have a drinking problem (in which case, mental health counseling and recovery programs like AA would be recommended), but because you’re concerned about the potential negative health effects? Or what if you just want to take a pause to reassess your relationship with alcohol? Or perhaps you’re abstaining just for the month as part of #SoberOctober or a diet plan like Whole30?
Quitting can still be tough (if it weren’t, Sober October wouldn’t be offered up as a challenge). We compiled a list of mental health experts’ and registered dietitians’ tips for how the non-alcoholic can get started going sober.
Stand back and ask: ‘How does drinking serve me?’
“When we are looking to change habits, including non-addictive alcohol consumption, we need to stand back and assess how the habit is serving us,” says Kristin Koskinen, a registered dietitian nutritionist. “Are there components of the habit that we aren’t willing to abandon, like the social nature of having drinks? Are there ways to work around it? What are the root drivers that make the habit appealing?”
People drink for a variety of reasons, Koskinen notes, but “stress-management and social connections” tend to top her clients’ lists.
“When clients decide to move away from an evening glass of wine (or two) to unwind, it can be helpful to find strategies to help bridge the gap from drinking alcohol to not. The association with relaxation can come from the process, as well as the chemical influence of that glass of wine. Components of the process include choosing a bottle, opening it, pouring into a special glass, and that first ‘bite’ that comes from the tannic and acidic players,” Koskinen says. “I ask clients to assess what it is about having a drink that serves them. Is it the feeling they get from the alcohol? Is it the suggestion that a glass in-hand means that the day is done and the pressure is off? What if we took the alcohol out of the picture, but kept the rest?”
Asking these questions helps you to reveal the drive behind the choice to drink in the first place. It can also help you to find alternatives to drinking that satisfy those needs.
“When we work through and tap into each component, break down the drives and processes, we can make choices that support our priorities (like hanging out with friends) without feeding the habit (polishing off a bottle of wine).”
Change up your routine
Not feeding the habit comes down in part to changing the ways you enable or encourage drinking.
“Change your routines for when you usually drink alcohol,” says Karen R. Koenig, a psychotherapist who has cut way back on drinking because of health risk warnings. “If you generally come home and have a beer, wine or cocktail, instead, get on the computer, take a walk, watch the news, etc. Do something differently than the activities you associate with drinking.”
Designate other rewards
“If drinking is a reward find another way to reward yourself,” says Amy Shapiro, RD and founder of Real Nutrition. “Self-care like baths work for those who have time but I would say add a serving of carbs to dinner or enjoy a healthy dessert or insert a healthy snack at the time you usually drink your drink at home. For example, enjoy air-popped popcorn while watching TV instead of sipping on that drink. Enjoy a half-cup of whole wheat pasta or quinoa with dinner to help you feel satisfied and calm (carbs often serve that purpose).”
Make a list of reasons for quitting — and refer to it often
Identify the benefits of quitting and write them down as a reminder of why you’re doing this.
“Make a list of all the reasons you don’t want to drink alcohol and read it over daily,” says Koenig. “Paste it on your car dashboard and your bathroom mirror. Remind yourself that you can drink alcohol but don’t want to. When you have cravings for alcohol, read over your list of why you don’t want to, distract yourself with another activity, and/or let the thought go by rather than engage with it. Sometimes fighting with a thought reinforces it.”
If you’re trying to shed a few pounds, keeping that goal in mind can be great a list-topper for why you’re quitting booze.
“Alcohol is preferentially metabolized by the liver because it’s a toxin,” says Nancy Woodbury, a registered dietitian nutritionist. “So when you drink alcohol and eat high-fat appetizers like baked brie, fried shrimp [or] crab cakes, it’s likely that these excess fat calories will simply be stored as fat. This might provide an extra incentive.”