“Stolen water is refreshing; food eaten in secret tastes the best”. Proverbs 9:17. This statement from the Bible is so profound and rings so true to the way of life all across the world, that no matter what “religion” or beliefs you express, we all can agree on this statement in lieu of the subject of “affairs”.
Maybe you have never taken anything (stolen) something that belonged to someone else. Maybe you’ve never daydreamed about being with someone else other than your (spouse). However there may have been a time or maybe this is the time that you have found yourself smack dab in the middle of an affair that you either orchestrated, encouraged or tried it one time and got stuck (no pun intended).
Let’s take a look a this list of: WHY’s, WHY NOT, HOW NOT TO’s, and HOW TO’s in the affairs of an Affair.
Why do we have affairs? Why shouldn’t we have an affair(s)? How not to have an affair, and How to stop having an affair(s).
First, Why do we have affairs?
Simple answer: We want to. Affairs don’t just happen, they are usually well thought out whether we admit it or not.
Second, Why shouldn’t we have an affair?
Another simple answer(s): It’s wrong, wrong, wrong #1. #2 It damages the very core of the person’s heart and soul (and yours). No matter how you try to convince yourself that you are not subject to pain and matters of the heart; you are only fooling yourself. Affairs at their best are just dirty little “common” acts of usury and greed. An affair takes, takes, takes, takes, and takes… until the giver is left depleted, unfulfilled, and dazed.
Third, How not to have an affair: Remember how you meet who you are still with (but cheating on them now)… I don’t want to believe you started saying to yourself or your mate, that “I am going to cheat on you the first chance I get”; unless of course this is your character. And if this is the case, you may as well drop down on your hands and knees and start barking. (No offense)
But if this is not how you truly are and you find yourself becoming “uninterested” in the person (wife, husband) that you are with and have been with for at least the past ten, twenty or more years… and you are becoming a little antsy and you begin to start looking at your wife/husband with disdain, may I humbly suggest that there’s nothing wrong with the person you married (especially) if you have hung in there this long… IT’S YOU!
You are not satisfied with you, and maybe you have tried to hold on to an image that has faded with time, and you just realized that time has passed you by, so now you want to start over with “fresh (lol) meat”. Keep in mind, even the grass on the other side will wither too; and who you are with is tried, tested and true. What you see is what you got, what you’ve had, and if you play your cards right, you will end up with a royal flush or four Aces every time. You are vested.
Simple answer to How not to have an affair: Think outside (the pants)… Starting over is costly… at EVERY LEVEL, and usually not worth the time, pain, shame, or the money even though you all may get over it at some stage of life. But why leave so much carnage behind when you can simply be honest with “yourself and about yourself” from the beginning of the relationship… before the engagement. Well, huh, hmm.
Fourth, How to stop having an affair: The reverse of how you started it. Stop creeping, and sneaking around. Call, text, sext, FB, Tweet, etc., etc., less and less, and start being HONEST (here’s a novel idea… um… stay home sometimes.
Ooh, What? Honest, with whom you may ask? YOURSELF for starters. Admit that you have unresolved inner issues. Issues that play out on everybody elses stage (life) that at best end up a tragedy or comedy. You have acted so long that you begin to believe your own hype, and agree with what’s wrong is right. This is uncontrolled behavior blinds and deceives you, spotlights the narcissus that you are or have become, you get the picture.
Get over yourself (man/woman), and get “with yourself”. There is no satisfaction for the flesh… it’s just like Seymores’ plant… the more you give it; the more it wants… FEEEEED MEEEEE!!!
A word of comfort and challenge to the “Single Folk”:
If you aren’t married and you are having an affair or have had an affair with someone other than the person you are “dating’… it’s not an affair you’re having… It’s just another a fling.
As painful and awful of an thought and act this may be; the truth of the matter is you or the person you’re “dating’ has no obligation to be faithful. You are both free moral agents, and have the liberty to date whom you will and want too at any time.
Sure you may say we are going to “exclusively only see each other”. And no doubt you mean it at the moment you make that declaration. But the reality is that there is always that sinking, hollow feeling that some day someone can come along and and become the next thing. So in conclusion I heard someone say, “Why buy the cow when you can get free milk’
Disclaimer: I am not calling anyone a dog, cow or any such animal. Just be careful how you present yourselves.
This is information,perception, and observation is not based on old fashioned, puritian self righteous ideas; but real life, with real people, that have and are being really scarred for life because of mankinds’ selfish, egotistical, pompus, greedy thoughts and ways.
LOVE “IS NOT” LUST, and LOVE “DO NOT” HURT. IT FEELS GOOD… BECAUSE IT IS GOOD… BECAUSE IT’S GOD’S LOVE.
Affairs “appear to be good” on the on set; but in the end it is exactly what it “looks like” a messy mess.
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