Ashes 2017-18: Australia v England, fifth Test, day two – live!

The players are back on the field. England starting with three slips and a gully for Jimmy. Bancroft is on strike, for perhaps his biggest innings yet as an Australian player. Play.

England are dismissed but won the morning, adding 113 for their final five wickets. That’s well above par relative to what we have seen from their bottom half this series.

A bit of Smith fielding magic got the home side going, taking a blinding catch at second slip to remove Malan just as the Middlesex man looked a lock for a second Ashes ton. But the opposite was true when Hazlewood and Cummins put down Curran and Moeen in consecutive overs shortly thereafter. Both shocking drops.

The latter didn’t last much longer in any case, beaten by a Cummins brute. The former, though, hung around for a very handy 39 at number eight. Broad did likewise at nine, adding 31 in 32 balls, twice clearing the square leg rope as he punished Australia for going too short for too long. It ended in a hurry, but no complaints. They did well.

Mix-up, Crane desperately trying to get back to the bowlers’ end with a dive, but Mitch Marsh’s throw to Bancroft is sufficient. England all out.

112th over: England 346-9 (Crane 4, Anderson 0) They crossed, so Crane has the last couple to see off from Lyon. Defends well. Meanwhile, all the chat at the SCG is about Bob Hawke skoling a beer. This is a bit hard to explain to UK readers. I’ll give it a crack at the interval.

At last, Australia get the bloke who annoys them more than any other. Lyon wins the top edge, straight in the air, Smith jumps around to complete the catch.

111th over: England 344-8 (Broad 29, Crane 4) Crane does well to keep his nerve in response to a short ball on his body, working it fine for one. Over the wicket Cummins goes now to Broad, and sends a bouncer too high over his head. A wide is called. That’ll annoy the captain. As will Broad having enough time to again swat him across the line, albeit only for one this time. Fuller to Crane, he grabs a couple to midwicket. Neato.

“I think these two tests should go down in the annals of Australian cricket as the Butterfingers Brace,” writes Andrew Benton. “What d’you think? The ball’s been pretty slippery for Australia since Perth.” Ric Finlay reports that Australia have put down 11 chances in the series.

110th over: England 339-8 (Broad 28, Crane 1) Lyon to Broad. He’s trying to sweep, unsuccessfully. Then defending. He does make contact sweeping behind square in the air, but Bancroft can’t complete what would have been a spectacular diving catch. About a metre away from it, to be fair. Broad beaten by the last ball of the over. Probably five overs left until the lunch break.

109th over: England 337-8 (Broad 26, Crane 1) Mason Crane is off the mark from his first ball via an inside edge. Just past Bancroft at short leg, but he won’t mind. He’s away in Test cricket. “The cricket is certainly entertaining,” notes the great Jim Maxwell on ABC. Broad has a go as well, down to fine leg off the top edge, they take a single to finish the eventful over.

A handy cameo comes to an end with some catching practice for Bancroft at short leg. Straight off the splice of the bat from the Cummins short ball, into the hands without having to move. Well played, Tom Curran.

108th over: England 334-7 (Curran 39, Broad 24) “The Australians haven’t even tried a yorker to use the element of surprise,” notes Simon Katich. They are trying Nathan Lyon, who slows the run rate down at least. Three singles. Broad keeps the strike, so he’ll resume his stoush with Cummins assuming the Aussie quick hasn’t been dragged.

107th over: England 331-7 (Curran 38, Broad 22) Disco Stuart Broad! Cummins is getting rather predicable with the short ball, the England villain able to navigate a slap over mid-on instead of taking on the fielders behind square. Four more for that. But then he decides to take on the catchers, doing it with a smashed pull across the line for a second six! This is fantastic stuff.

106th over: England 320-7 (Curran 38, Broad 11) Marsh to his new Surrey teammate and childhood pal Tom Curran. But just as he did in the previous over, he is more than happy having a crack at the first ball, getting just enough on it through backward point for another boundary. He cops a whack from a shorter one, but keeps going. Awkward singles exchanged later in the over before Curran pulls the last ball with power to the square leg rope. That’s the shot of a top six bat. Ten from the over. Very much England’s morning. Australia have 38 minutes to finish the job before lunch.

105th over: England 310-7 (Curran 29, Broad 10) Ha! Cummins, the meanest quick in all the land, bowls a series of bumpers at Broad. Of course he does. But the Englishman, well aware of what is coming to finish, only goes and nails the most lovely pull shot over square leg and into the crowd! Superb work. At various times during the over it looked like the partnership would be broken, but Broad is coming off a half-century at the MCG and seeing them well. Go you good thing.

104th over: England 300-7 (Curran 28, Broad 1) Mitch Marsh gets a twist for the first time today. Not Starc? Interesting. Curran doesn’t mind, flaying at the first ball in a sign that he doesn’t have much faith in the batting to come. It goes through fourth slip, but only two are in position, so he gets four runs. He pulls safely enough when the short ball comes, giving Broad the strike. He knows it is going at his body as well, so he makes room to slap over square leg to the sweeper. That beings up the England 300. “I think we have entered the entertaining phase of this innings,” says Al Nicholson on ABC radio.

“Bloody hell, it’s all go out there” writes Robert Wilson. “Having got my hands on a pre-pub copy of Michael Wolff’s Trump is a Nut book, it took quite a lot to drag me away.” (I want it now). “That bonkers Smith catch did the job beautifully. I’m back in the world of moral rectitude and sledging. Speaking of which, given your political previous life, I’m sure you were always working out who you were most like on The West Wing (Josh is a slam-dunk – though Toby is always in with a chance). That was then and this is now. Can you work out who you are most like in the Trump administration. Does seeing Stephen Miller make you feel all hot and uncomfortable? (I’m Bannon, by the way, mostly because I am currently wearing two tshirts and once read half of that dopey Well of Saints book).” Rich content, as they say. I am returning to this in the innings break when there is less going on.

103rd over: England 294-7 (Curran 23, Broad 0) A fair bit of chat about whether that was the third bouncer at Moeen for the over. Decent point if the umpire already gave the signal for two above shoulder height? Surely he did given that the first two balls of the over were bumpers. Broad is here now, cue the hammed up booing. And nearly gone first ball! Jumping across his crease, he got something on it down to forward short leg, but it falls just out of the reach of Cameron Bancroft. And nearly a repeat next up! Doesn’t make it quite as close to the man under the helmet this time, though. Can be sure that’s exactly what Cummins will go with if he gets another crack at him.

Meanwhile, Gary is back on the aesthetic charm (or otherwise) of Lyon’s approach.

Excellent short ball from Cummins. Moeen considers leaving, ends up playing with both feet off the ground. The glove is clipped, his innings is over. Beautiful bowling.

102nd over: England 294-6 (Moeen 30, Curran 23) Lyon to Curran. Defending. Better. Then pushing one to mid-off when the spinner gives him the chance. Moeen does likewise to retain the strike. They’ve put on 43.

101st over: England 292-6 (Moeen 29, Curran 22) Cummins short again at Moeen from the get-go after the breather, but he is up to the task, pulling a couple. On reflection, not the most controlled stroke. But there is no fielder there, so play on. Oh gosh, he tries to lift the next short ball over the slips cordon. Thankfully for the left-hander, he didn’t make contact. Can’t let himself nick off here. A couple through cover to finish, which should help with his confidence against the Australian quick. Better.

Sorry,” begins Rob Heath. “I won’t have that about Lyon being good to watch. I’ll give you that he delivers a nicely flighted ball with dip and arc and all that baloney, but his “run-up”, with one-and-a-half steps of running suddenly switching into a brisk walk and then back to running again, and the ridiculous windmilling of his elbows and knees immediately prior to delivery, are the most infuriating things to watch. Every single time, you think “surely he’s not going to do all that again” But he does!” Your move, Gary Naylor.

100th over: England 288-6 (Moeen 25, Curran 22) Moeen pushes to midwicket. He’s been good through that region off both pace and spin so far this morning. He’s made it to the drinks break. Not for nothing after the series he has had. Enjoy that drink. I’ll grab one too. Back in a tic.

99th over: England 287-6 (Moeen 24, Curran 22) ANOTHER DROPPED CATCH! Hazlewood this time! Top edge from Moeen to Cummins’ first ball. Maybe it serves him right after the chance he put down in the previous over. But still, goodness me. Hazlewood was running around from mid-on to midwicket. He wouldn’t have seen an easier catch in his days as an Australian player. Both England players dropped inside five balls. One brilliant chance taken by Smith, then two of the most basic put down. Curran’s now on strike, getting one to midwicket. Predicably, Cummins is back upstairs to Moeen to finish off. He grabs one off the back foot. Good batting. Scenes!

“Difficult to judge the value of England’s first innings without prior knowledge of Steve Smith’s score,” writes Brian Withington. “Less than a ton for him and 300 might be very sporting. More than 150 and the same may start looking distinctly anaemic. Please pass the blood transfusion bottle, nurse.” Bit like that, isn’t it?

98th over: England 284-6 (Moeen 22, Curran 21) DROPPED CATCH! Cummins! You don’t see that. I’ve never seen him drop a catch! At mid-on, catching practice from Curran. Lyon should be in the book, but isn’t. How has he put that down? Chris Rogers cannot believe it on the radio. “You would back him to take that 100 times in 100.” Wow. Curran survives. Maiden.

97th over: England 284-6 (Moeen 22, Curran 21) Handy little stand between these two now, both players into the 20s with four balls scored from in the Hazlewood over. Moeen nudged fine, Curran hooked, Moeen on the drive for a couple. Continuing to swing the bat hard, Moeen gets a fat edge that runs through the cordon and down to the rope. Nothing pretty about it, but they’ve collected eight from the set. That’ll do.

96th over: England 276-6 (Moeen 15, Curran 20) Curran is having a lovely time! Down the track and lashing Lyon through cover for a third boundary. There are risks involved to play this way, but he’s up to 20 by the end of the over when cutting a couple more. By the standards of England players at number eight across this series, 20 is more than ample. Oh, hang on. He’s nearly ran out last ball. By Paine. He’s edged onto the pad and doesn’t ground his bat immediately. Gee, he’s lucky there. Drops his blade just over the line just in time. Concentrate! The first hour complete. England have probably won it, given the locals were operating witih the second new ball. No Cummins yet. Hmmm.

John Starbuck again, on Lyon. “Gary Naylor is correct as usual, in that most really good bowlers, particularly spinners, only become so in retrospect. It’s a wonderful opportunity for humblebrags, with batsmen who faced whoever-it-is saying how difficult he was to pick, how so many of their partners he got, while ‘I was fortunate enough to get a few fifties/centuries against him but he caused problems all the way, you could never settle’. Humbug.”

I remember facing Lyon in the nets quite a bit when he was 21 and club captain at Wests in Canberra. It wasn’t the spin that made me look foolish, but the drop. If cricket doesn’t work out for him later in life, he should go into the DJing caper.

95th over: England 270-6 (Moeen 15, Curran 14) Flashy! Curran drives Hazlewood on up and through the covers but only just wide of Jackson Bird who is on for Warner. For the briefest moment it looked liked his dive would be enough, but missed by about a foot. “I’m not sure about this approach,” says Ali Mitchell on the radio. He looks much better when playing the same stroke along the ground later in the over. Then keeps the strike with a clip through midwicket. “It’s a strange old innings,” adds Dirk Nannes.

94th over: England 263-6 (Moeen 15, Curran 7) The Richies have their first sing of the day, rolling out their tune about Nathan Lyon. That’s all I’ll say about them for now. The focus of their attention finds Curran’s inside edge for a second time. A big chance to go through his gate, tossing it up to encourage that mode of dismissal. The new man cuts when the spinner drops short. That’s better. Moeen defends the rest.

93rd over: England 262-6 (Moeen 15, Curran 6) Josh Hazlewood to replace Starc. Sure enough, a maiden to begin to Moeen. But with a focus on peppering Moeen’s body rather than his off-stump channel. Hits him on the side at one stage. A couple of bouncers in there too. Softening the left-hander up for Lyon? Something like that.

John Starbuck is having a decent old frolic on Mason Crane’s name on the email, continuing the chat that Geoff had going as the rain fell yesterday morning.

“Further to yesterday’s conjuring with Mason Crane’s name as a mortar hoist, a few others.

Alastair Cook – Still on the building site, he’s the one instructed to add fresh bacon sandwiches (from an oil-drum barbie) to the tea brewing.

Mark Stoneman – A gargoyle designer.

Vince – add two strokes for a Shepherd’s Pie.

Joe Root – Quasi-professional folk singer (or bluesman, given this series so far).

Dawid Malan – no idea, but sounds a but like yachting technicals.

Jonny Bairstow – keeper of wild animals.

Moeen Ali – Narrow lane for storing garden equipment.

Curran, T. – Purveyor of exotic eastern refreshments.

Stuart Broad – Lascivious minor royal.

Jimmy Anderson – narrow boat lift engineer/lives in a tin hut.Mark Wood – reserve scorer.”

92nd over: England 262-6 (Moeen 15, Curran 6) Curran looks in control on the front foot to begin, down the ground for one. Moeen does likewise, dancing to the pitch of the ball. Dragging his length back a bit, the spinner rips one at the right-handed Curran, beating him on the inside edge. Close call. Then finds the inside edge with one that also rags. “Lyon is getting more turn this morning,” says Dirk Nannes on ABC. Sure is.

91st over: England 260-6 (Moeen 14, Curran 5) Starc to Moeen. Again gets off the mark first ball. Dare I say it, he’s looking alright. Pulling on this occasion, along the carpet. Curran helps one in that direction too, albeit off his thigh pad. Moeen a thrid run from the over off the pads. Pace has improved this morning, but Starc’s line is far from consistent. Curran wants nothing to do with a bumper later in the set, but is happy to drive through cover for one to retain the strike.

90th over: England 256-6 (Moeen 12, Curran 4) Lyon to Moeen. He’s wide to begin, allowing a single to be cut through point from the man who has been his best buddy throughout the series. Curran looks far from comfortable from there, looking to score but doing so awkwardly. In saying that, he defends the last couple of balls solidly. That’ll be good for the confidence. A fair few nerves, presumably.

89th over: England 255-6 (Moeen 11, Curran 4) Curran elevated to no. 8. Massive job ahead of the man playing his second Test. And he’s slashing at Starc first ball, past point for four! Have that! Then nearly bowled next ball, Starc too quick. Haven’t had the chance to say that too often in this innings. Just got his bat down in time. Neglected to add, Moeen edged before the wicket earlier in the over, to the rope through the cordon. That pushed England above 250. “There’s no reason why 270 or so shouldn’t be a significant first innings score,” adds Adam Hirst in response to John Starbuck. Droll.

Meanwhile, how about that snaffle… pop it on loop.

WHAT A CATCH! WHAT A CATCH! Starc finds Malan’s edge, the left-hander stuck on the crease, but this is all about Steve Smith. Diving with his left hand low, snaffles it an inch from the ground. “One of the best catches he will ever take,” says Simon Katich on the radio. Sure was. Will dig out the vision right away.

88th over: England 244-5 (Malan 62, Moeen 4) Nathan “Nathan” Lyon into the attack for the first time today. Finds Moeen’s edge first ball, but safely to ground, a single taken. Malan more convincing, driving gracefully off the front foot through cover for his first boundary of the day. That’s a super shot. Nearly another edge to end the over, Malan beaten with a nothing shot off the back foot. Eventful start for the tweaker.

87th over: England 239-5 (Malan 58, Moeen 3) Moeen’s third run off the pads, Starc obliging with the first ball of his new over. Another on Malan’s feet too, slipping down. Poor start from the Australian attack leader. Malan then gets a chance to cut, but Khawaja does wonderfully to make the stop at backward point. Was another ball that deserved punishment. He then gets a couple down the ground, leaning on a drive. Busy over. Had looked at home in the top flight throughout the series. Good on him.

“There’s no reason why 300 or so shouldn’t be a significant first innings score,” suggests my man Johnny Starbuck. “We’ve grown so used to the 400-500+ that we forget how a relatively low-scoring games can be one of the best. The pitch, the mood and experience of the bowlers, the catches dropped or taken, the idiocy of the batsmen all pay a part.”

86th over: England 236-5 (Malan 56, Moeen 2) Had a couple of colleagues inform me that THREE TIME Hawthorn Premiership player Josh Gibson is in the press box. No idea why, but welcome along you Golden God Bird. Distracted me from Big Josh’s over, if I’m honest. Malan did take one down the ground to get his day going. Moeen didn’t need his bat until Hazlewood misdirected onto his pads, clipping his second run. Sedate start from him compared to last week in Melbourne. “Starc won’t get Ali out with the new ball,” emails Yum. “He’s saving himself for Lyon.”

85th over: England 234-5 (Malan 55, Moeen 1) Starc really isn’t penetrating. A third ball on the trot down the legside to begin. Then finds his line to Moeen, if not quite his length. A bouncer blows out the cobwebs, maybe. Not a lot going on from the Randwick End. Maiden.

84th over: England 234-5 (Malan 55, Moeen 1) Malan has Hazlewood zipping it away from him then back at his pads, an inside edge located in the process. Then a really good leave just north of his off-stump. It encourages the quick to change direction from round the wicket. Malan defends then shoulders arms. Good early scrap. Maiden.

A lot of chat on my twitter feed about Cummins v Rabada come March in South Africa across four Test Matches. Cannot wait for that. I’ll be there throughout, so we can continue this OBO discussion for months on end. Wouldn’t have it any other way.

“So another fascinating day ahead of us,” emails Peter Rowntree. “First up can Mo do anything to start to salvage what looks to be a failing Test career? Then we will also have Mason Crane’s first Test innings to study. Many jokes about Mason’s name on here yesterday – but surely this classic beats all.”

83rd over: England 234-5 (Malan 55, Moeen 1) Pedestrian start by Starc standards, his first three deliveries comfortably below 140kph. Watchful Moeen. Sprays the last couple well down the legside. A maiden, but a wasted over with the second new ball. Yesterday, CricViz calculated for me that it was the slowest that the left-armer has ever bowled on average in a Test played in Australia. Is he fit? Not an unreasonable query.

82nd over: England 234-5 (Malan 55, Moeen 1) Good start from Moeen, clipping a single to the first ball of the day. One to come in the over, sprayed down the legside. Also liked this last night from Phil Walker at Wisden, especially the Volvo line.

Fine point on Cummins. “He’ll only be the best when commentators stop pronouncing his surname with a ‘g’ at the end,” tweets Geoff Foley. WILL IT EVER END? As a radio commentator myself, I know well the risk of repeating a name wrongly time and again. Can be difficult to adjust once you have it in your muscle memory. But this one makes no sense. Anyway, the players are on the field, so we can worry about that later. Josh Hazlewood to complete his over, Moeen Ali to face his first ball. Buckle up. This could be a loose first half an hour.

Righto, upstairs now. Quite the mission. But I can confirm that it is sparkling day in the harbour city. Not a cloud, not that hot. Perfect for leather versus willow.

Nathan Early with the early mail to get us going. “I reckon we’ll learn a bunch about Root The Captain with his handling of Mason Crane later today,” he wrties. “Don’t hook him after 4-0-32-0.” From our parish more often than not, but writing next door at the moment, Will Mac did a lovely bit on the leggie ahead of the Test. What a day for Mason.

I also enjoyed Ali Martin’s intro last night. We spent far too much time trying to find the Yabba statue with the binoculars. Worth it in the end. On what the famous sledger may have said to James Vince when he nicked off yesterday afternoon.

Adam will be here shortly. Meanwhile, read Ali Martin on another maddening innings by England batsman James Vince.

One wonders what Yabba would have come up with for James Vince, a touring batsman with the inbuilt capacity to both delight and infuriate in equal measure, and never more so than on the opening day of this fifth Ashes Test. For 82 minutes at the crease Vince looked the part as he so often does, dispatching the bad balls like Jardine versus the local insect population en route to a 25 that can be added to the list of magnificent yet maddening innings.